The Tyranny of the Early Riser

Night Owls of the World, Unite!

Mar 15, 2024

∙ Paid

Woman lying in bed turning off an alarm clock in the morning at 5am. Hand turns off the alarm clock waking up at morning, girl turns off the alarm clock waking up in the morning from a call. — Unsplash

Let me tell you about my buddies Jules and Jim. Jules awakes with the roosters, concludes cross-fit by 6:30 a.m. and leaps to his eight-hour workday at 7:30 a.m. sharp. Jim stumbles to the shower by 10 a.m., is still clearing cobwebs at 11 a.m., and at noon begins a workday that might take him well past midnight. Which of the two is widely deemed the more industrious?

I think every reader knows that by and large, it’s Jules. Few will factor in Jim’s longer hours, and some will consider him bizarre. The assumption that mornings equal industry is so widespread that it can only be the result of an international conspiracy: the Tyranny of the Early Riser. The evidence for its existence is clear as day, if you will.

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